'You're hereby sentenced to 500 hours community service repairing furniture and cooking porridge for local woodland creatures.'
(USDA Canine Food Pyramid -Categories include 'Dog food', 'Plants' grass & weeds', 'Furniture, shoes, etc...', 'Litter box by-products', 'Cat food', 'Toys (dog & otherwise), 'Stuff found on the floor')
(Stores have signs reading 'Furniture' and 'Unfinished Furniture', forest next door has sign reading 'Not Even Begun Furniture')
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