'I've lived every day like it was my last. And now that it's here, honestly, it's kind of anticlimactic.'
(Leprechaun at desk has rainbow going into pot on one side, and a rain cloud over an inbox of paperwork on the other.)
(Mom Warnings for the 21st Century - 'Unless you use Botox, your face will never freeze like that.' - 'Oh, and if a podcast told you to jump off a bridge?!' - 'If you Google yourself you'll go blind!')
'You're hereby sentenced to 500 hours community service repairing furniture and cooking porridge for local woodland creatures.'
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